The Things I Never Thought About...

I remember when we got pregnant with Austin how excited we were and the things we talked about that would change but there are some things that I didn't think about and I don't think if I had it would make things easier.   Wednesday night I had a major meltdown because I miss spending all my moments with Austin.  I got spoiled being able to spend from April-August with him and it has made it really hard leaving him.  I think that I was in denial about the I was having a hard time and just pushing it back and pushing it back and trying to be strong that I just couldn't keep it in anymore and the flood gates opened.  David of course was wonderful and very supportive and tried to make me feel better.  I explained to him that I just don't want to miss anything and he told me, "You see how Austin lights up, grins, and laughs with you.  He is going to save it all for you."  I thought that was very sweet.  It is amazing how much love you can have for someone so small and instantly.  I mean from the day he was born he stole my heart.  I am going to be one of those moms that wants to get another hug and kiss and he is going to be like "Ahhh, mom.  Stop."  Haha.  I love the place he goes to school and he is doing so well (which has made it so much better on me) but it is hard going from getting to spend 24/7 with him to only spending 5 hours a day with him.  People say it will get better and I hope that it does but I am sure there will be times here and there where the flood gates will open again.  Haha.  I had David take a picture of Austin and I that night because I wanted to capture him still being a baby and resting on me.  Haha.  I can't get enough of our perfect son Austin!